The realisation hit Christian with all of the force of a bus slamming into his body, and he couldn't help the small, sharp gasp as he stared at Sean. He wondered how it was possible- he had seen the pictures of Sean and Mortensen at the premiere. He had seen exactly how he looked at the other man; saw the love that shone from his eyes. Sean gave Mortensen the tiny little smiles that he had never given Christian; he looked at him with a kind of tenderness that he had never turned to him, and Christian had been filled with such jealousy and rage that he almost destroyed the computer that were playing the images.
But now Sean was looking at him, leaning forward with his lips parted and his fucking beautiful green eyes shining with want and desire and Christian just wanted to slam him against the wall and kiss him again. Kiss him over and over until he forgot who Mortensen was; until he understood that when Christian claimed someone, it was for his entire life. Sean shouldn't love anyone but him. He shouldn't have anything but him.
"Count me one of the masses, then," he spat out, his words poisonous and his voice harsh. "Just one of the many groupies of Sean Bean, all wanting a piece of him."
But even as he spoke he knew that he was being unfair and hypocritical. He was here because, most likely, Sibi had called Sean and told him to do something about Christian's shitty mood. No matter how long he had been with Sean, no matter how intense he dived into him and buried himself in his body- no matter how much he gave into his desire and want for Sean, he would always, always love Sibi more. She wasn't a phantom that hung over them, but she was a presence that would never leave, because Christian loved her, and he would never stop loving her.
It didn't mean that he didn't love Sean. He loved them both- Sibi for her fiery nature, her refusal to take any of Christian's bullshit, her ability to get him to calm down and her sheer acceptance of everything that he was, warts and instability and all; Sean for his unquestioning knowledge of who Christian was, for his willingness to indulge in him, for his ability to push back against him and be any of his characters if that was what Christian required of him.
What claim did Christian have on Sean when he couldn't even claim him publicly? The furthest Christian had gone was to thanking him during his Best Actor Oscar acceptance speech, and he had done that with David O'Russell and fucking Marky Mark and neither of them meant anywhere near the same thing to him.
He knew - he had always known - that Mortensen could give Sean the openness that he deserved. He could give all of himself to Sean, just like Christian had all of Sibi. What he just didn't understand was this- Mortensen should know that Sean was here. He should know what was going to happen, because Christian's urge to throw Sean to the floor and give his back rug burn by fucking him into the carpet hadn't faded whatsoever, realisations or not. So why had Sean come at all?
Christian was tired of having to deal with people who were nothing like the selfish, grasping bastards that he had been dealing with all of his life. They were so goddamn unpredictable that they were making his head spin. He reached out, rubbing against his own eyes.
"Fucking hell," he breathed, quietly. Then he took another deep breath and reached forward, his fingers curling around Sean's jaw. "You still want this," he said, and he kept his voice steady and kept the wonder out of it.
"I've known since the Oscars two years ago, you idiot wanker," the insult was almost affectionate, and his thumb stroked against Sean's chin. "I was waiting, wondering if you fucking noticed that I haven't called you for the whole of the time you're with Mortensen. Wondering when the hell you were going to tell me that you're his now. Wondering when he was going to call me up and tell me to never go near you again. Wondering what the fuck is happening when neither happened."
His hands both reached up now, his fingertips barely touching Sean's face, pressing gently against his jaw. Christian pressed his forehead against Sean's, and his breath shuddered out of him, against Sean's lips. Christian's eyes practically gleamed with want. "I'm going to kiss you, then I'm going to drag you to the bedroom and fuck you until you can't walk. If you don't shove me away in the next five seconds, I'm going to take that as a yes."
no subject
The realisation hit Christian with all of the force of a bus slamming into his body, and he couldn't help the small, sharp gasp as he stared at Sean. He wondered how it was possible- he had seen the pictures of Sean and Mortensen at the premiere. He had seen exactly how he looked at the other man; saw the love that shone from his eyes. Sean gave Mortensen the tiny little smiles that he had never given Christian; he looked at him with a kind of tenderness that he had never turned to him, and Christian had been filled with such jealousy and rage that he almost destroyed the computer that were playing the images.
But now Sean was looking at him, leaning forward with his lips parted and his fucking beautiful green eyes shining with want and desire and Christian just wanted to slam him against the wall and kiss him again. Kiss him over and over until he forgot who Mortensen was; until he understood that when Christian claimed someone, it was for his entire life. Sean shouldn't love anyone but him. He shouldn't have anything but him.
"Count me one of the masses, then," he spat out, his words poisonous and his voice harsh. "Just one of the many groupies of Sean Bean, all wanting a piece of him."
But even as he spoke he knew that he was being unfair and hypocritical. He was here because, most likely, Sibi had called Sean and told him to do something about Christian's shitty mood. No matter how long he had been with Sean, no matter how intense he dived into him and buried himself in his body- no matter how much he gave into his desire and want for Sean, he would always, always love Sibi more. She wasn't a phantom that hung over them, but she was a presence that would never leave, because Christian loved her, and he would never stop loving her.
It didn't mean that he didn't love Sean. He loved them both- Sibi for her fiery nature, her refusal to take any of Christian's bullshit, her ability to get him to calm down and her sheer acceptance of everything that he was, warts and instability and all; Sean for his unquestioning knowledge of who Christian was, for his willingness to indulge in him, for his ability to push back against him and be any of his characters if that was what Christian required of him.
What claim did Christian have on Sean when he couldn't even claim him publicly? The furthest Christian had gone was to thanking him during his Best Actor Oscar acceptance speech, and he had done that with David O'Russell and fucking Marky Mark and neither of them meant anywhere near the same thing to him.
He knew - he had always known - that Mortensen could give Sean the openness that he deserved. He could give all of himself to Sean, just like Christian had all of Sibi. What he just didn't understand was this- Mortensen should know that Sean was here. He should know what was going to happen, because Christian's urge to throw Sean to the floor and give his back rug burn by fucking him into the carpet hadn't faded whatsoever, realisations or not. So why had Sean come at all?
Christian was tired of having to deal with people who were nothing like the selfish, grasping bastards that he had been dealing with all of his life. They were so goddamn unpredictable that they were making his head spin. He reached out, rubbing against his own eyes.
"Fucking hell," he breathed, quietly. Then he took another deep breath and reached forward, his fingers curling around Sean's jaw. "You still want this," he said, and he kept his voice steady and kept the wonder out of it.
"I've known since the Oscars two years ago, you idiot wanker," the insult was almost affectionate, and his thumb stroked against Sean's chin. "I was waiting, wondering if you fucking noticed that I haven't called you for the whole of the time you're with Mortensen. Wondering when the hell you were going to tell me that you're his now. Wondering when he was going to call me up and tell me to never go near you again. Wondering what the fuck is happening when neither happened."
His hands both reached up now, his fingertips barely touching Sean's face, pressing gently against his jaw. Christian pressed his forehead against Sean's, and his breath shuddered out of him, against Sean's lips. Christian's eyes practically gleamed with want. "I'm going to kiss you, then I'm going to drag you to the bedroom and fuck you until you can't walk. If you don't shove me away in the next five seconds, I'm going to take that as a yes."
He waited.